Doc. Dilemma

There are some situations which can cause a lot of marital conflicts and personal dilemma. But none, I think, as distressing as when it concerns our children's health and medical well-being.

It could be an accident, high fever or a diarrhoea that's been running for days. More often than not, one spouse would be more anxious than the other in seeking medical attention.

Spouse #1: Oh no, something's not right with Tommy.

Spouse #2: He looks fine to me.

Spouse #1: I think we better bring him to a doctor.

Spouse #2: You're over reacting.

Spouse #1: Don't you care about our child? Must he be bed-ridden before you do something?

Spouse #2: It'll be a waste of money. The doctor will say he's fine and prescribe him medicine which you throw away anyway.

Spouse #1: You're heartless! What if it's something serious which could have been prevented?

Spouse #2: I still say you're over reacting..I don't give doctors free money.

Familiar?

This is further exacerbated by the fact that there doesn't seem to be a standard medical practice. One doctor prescribes one treatment which can be refuted by another doctor. The patients might have to seek a few opinions to confirm the first one at the expense of our pockets and children's welfare.

For instance, a friend's son had a prolonged stomach pain. They consulted a paediatrician who immediately admitted him (after asking if they had a medical card) and prescribed a cocktail of drugs for the little boy.  When his condition was not improving, they decided to consult a second paedtrician who told them the drugs were unnecessary. He prescribed only one type of medicine which the boy took and recovered speedily after that.

My Dilemma

In my case, when I sought a second opinion (Thud! My Baby Fell!) the paediatrician advised X-Ray on the fourth day after my baby's fall to ensure there was no fracture. I complied after I asked him if there will be any side effects from the rays to which he replied there was nothing to worry about.

My husband blew his top when he found out I allowed our child to be X-rayed.

"YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER THAN TO LISTEN TO THE DOCTOR!!!" he said.

How was I supposed to know better? Google!!?

Anyway, easier said than done.

When you present your sick/injured child to a doctor and he/she paints you the worst case scenario e.g. she might develop bronchitis/the high fever could affect his brain/the fall could have caused internal injury...etc and they recommend a treatment (usually a very costly one) followed by "But it's your choice of course." .... How easy is it for any responsible parent to just say "Nah, I'll take a gamble.. maybe it's not so bad.."...???

Unnecessary X-Ray

Having said that, when I checked with another doctor and friends in medical related jobs, I was told that if a child shows no abnormal symptoms and since it was already 4 days, there should be no cause for concern. But even if there was a hairline fracture on the skull, nothing can be done about it. So, usually doctors let the fracture heal by themselves. Also, X-rays are usually recommended only when it's really, really necessary as X-rays can stunt children's growth and development albeit in large doses.   [See : Are X-Rays harmful to children?]

The words "annoyed, miffed, angry, betrayed" were not sufficient to even begin describing my inner turmoil then. It's one thing if I have to pay more for the recommended treatment/test (which I mind less), it's another thing if that treatment/test may have an adverse effect on my child. Surely, if the doctor had firmly said my child was alright without X-Ray, I would not have opted for it.

Choices, choices, choices....
One can choose of course to go to general hospital where it is more economical and doctors are not profit-oriented. The treatment may not be inferior to that of private hospitals'. Of course, the downside is that the queue may be super-long and more often than not, the patient will be sent from one counter to another to register, to wait, to pay...etc.

OR, consult doctor friends and experienced parents to get corroborating information on a medical condition and prescribed treatment before giving it the green light.

Conclusion and Appreciation
At the end of the day, we parents just want the best for our children and that includes healthcare. Usually, parents who can afford it don't mind paying for immediate and the best medical attention. But really, it's another story altogether when doctors cash in on patients' illnesses by prescribing unnecessary and costly scans or treatments which may also have adverse effects on the patients. 

Therefore, I raise my hat off to doctors who genuinely care for their patients' well-being, whether in private or public practice. It's not easy working long hours, being sleep-deprived, having to entertain difficult patients and remaining professional at all times. So, my appreciation goes out to you, good doctors..

Perhaps some good doctors or experienced parents can advise on the best course of action to take in the event of a medical situation involving kids?

Carpe Diem, ladies!
Becky