Mercury in Fish

My girl asked me one day:

"Mummy, is fish smart?"

"Hmm.. I don't think so. They have very small brains."

"Then why did Grandma say I must eat fish to be smart?"

That really cracked me up! ;D

The old wives' tale that eating fish is good for brains has its place. 

I am, however, more concerned about the level of mercury in fish as nowadays, our rivers and seas are superbly toxic what with oil spills, toxic waste and chemicals conveniently dumped into our global waters. I have a friend who used to work off shore on an oil rig and he said that whatever liquid chemicals that weren't needed anymore were poured into the sea-- on a daily basis!

What is considered a dangerous level of mercury in our bodies?

"Most non-exposed people have mercury levels of 0 to 2 (all blood measurements are in micrograms of mercury per deciliter of blood, or ug/dl). Levels above 2.8 ug/dl are required to be reported to the Health Department. This test can be influenced by eating fish, because fish (particularly certain deep sea fish) may contain mercury."

Source: Mercury (read more for the side effects on health)

So I compiled a list of fish which has the lowest to the highest content of mercury as a guideline. Hope you'll find it helpful.

LOWEST MERCURY

Eat 2-3 servings a week (pregnant women and small children should not eat more than 12 ounces (2 servings):

• Anchovies
• Catfish
• Clam
• Crab
• Crawfish
• Flounder
• Haddock
• Herring
• Mackerel
• Mullet
• Oyster
• Perch
• Pollock
• Salmon
• Sardine 
• Scallop
• Shrimp
• Sole
• Squid
• Tilapia
• Trout
• Whitefish

MODERATE MERCURY

Eat six servings or fewer per month (pregnant women and small children should avoid these):

• Bass
• Carp
• Cod
• Halibut
• Lobster
• Mahi Mahi
• Monkfish
• Perch
• Snapper
• Tuna (Canned Chunk light)

HIGH MERCURY

Eat three servings or less per month (pregnant women and small children should avoid these):

• Bluefish
• Grouper
• Sea Bass
• Tuna (Canned Albacore, Yellowfin) 

HIGHEST MERCURY

Avoid eating (everyone):

• Marlin
• Orange Roughy
• Shark
• Swordfish
• Tilefish
• Tuna (Ahi)

More: Mercury Levels in Fish 

          Mercury in Malaysian Fish

_{Sources:
Food and Drug Administration (FDA). Mercury Levels in Commercial Fish and Shellfish
Food and Drug Administration (FDA). What You Need to Know About Mercury in Fish and Shellfish
National Resource Defense Council. Mecury Contamination in Fish.
Centers for Disease Control. Public Health Statement for Mercury. Agency for Toxic Substances and Disease Registry.}

_{Carpe Diem, ladies!}

_Becky

Would You Give Your Family Supplements?

There are three things in life we cannot escape:  

Death, Taxes..................................................... and the Direct Salesman! 

(Cymbals clang... "Thank you, Thank you! Yes, I love cheese...")

Honestly, if you're not an MLM (Multi-Level Marketing) distributor, you would have at least been approached by a stranger, friend or a relative who is one. Every company would claim that theirs is the miracle product, helps you lose weight, can cure all sorts of illnesses, beautify you from inside out, prevent dread diseases and etc etc etc. Some of the direct salespeople that have approached me and my family are from brands like Amway, Melilea, Cosway, Herbalife, Forever Living, Transfer Factor, Usana... to name a few. 

Although we have tried some, my husband is a stubborn skeptic while I sit on the fence on this matter. We have always maintained that as long as we eat a healthful and balanced diet, we should be doing alright. Right?

So I asked some friends of ours over dinner last night. They are mature parents with three kids. Straight away they gave a resounding "YES! Health supplements work!" The husband said that due to his less-than-healthy lifestyle when he was much younger, he should be stricken with some form of illnesses by now. But unlike some of his friends who are either sickly, unhealthy-looking, balding due to a lifestyle of excess, he claims that he is in good health (well, he is certainly healthy looking). He believes that if he were to stop taking these supplements, all illnesses would surface. His wife opined that our natural food is no better nowadays what with all the growth hormones injected into meat, pesticide-laced vegetables, chemical-ridden imported foods..etc. Plus, depending on how meticulous we are, vegetables also tend to lose their goodness during the course of preparation and cooking. Also, people tend to eat out a lot more due to work and convenience.  

Hmmm.....

Then, an article I came across got me wondering if we should perhaps balance our food intake with supplements after all. Check out Bizzarre Effects on Teens.

According to Dr Alice Prethima, she is seeing many cases of abnormalities in male and female teens due to the food chain and diet e.g. girls with too much hair where it shouldn't be and boys growing breasts (pic), a condition called gynecomastia. She further elaborated that we're eating too much meat and meat contain growth hormones previously injected into the animals. 

Besides that, bad oestrogens enter our bodies from:
a) Plastic materials e.g. fizzy bottled drinks
b) Polysterene containers when we pack food
c) Plastic bags/wrappers which are used to wrap food e.g. roti canai, curry, laksa...etc
d) Pesticides, insecticides and other bad oestrogenic substances in the environment.

It is a scary thought isn't it? That the food we take could potentially cause our sons to have breasts and daughters to be hairy.

Perhaps supplements aren't such a bad idea after all? Unless you're a farmer or you grow your own vegetables, it seems 'natural' foods nowadays aren't so natural: Meat with hormones, vegetables with pesticide, fish with mercury, dairy products with melamine...etc. I worry for our children!

What do you reckon?

More on:
Why Supplements are Good for You. 
Are Vitamins and Mineral Supplements Good for You? 
Safety of Herbal Supplements 

Man Talk - Jared

Name: Jared

Location: Wellington, New Zealand

Age: 27
Married for 20 months (AGES!!!!!! hahaha)

1) "To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not understand her at all." What is your take on the above statement?

Jared: I don't really agree with this statement. I've heard something similar in that men would rather be respected more than loved which I think can be true in some sense, and for a lot of men this may be the case. However, I think these 2 things (love and understanding/respect) go hand in hand. To be able to truly love my Wife in the capacity she needs and deserves, I need to understand how she works/thinks (as hard as that may seem sometimes haha), how she feels loved, and how I can best show that to her.
Likewise, if my wife understands me, yet does not love me, then she would just be the same as any other person who has taken the time to get to know me. Many of my friends understand me, that doesn't mean they want to be married to me.

2) Which part of the wedding vow do you hold especially dear to your heart? Why?

Jared:  The part of our vows which I hold dear is "I will ... always seek your good with all my strength and all the strength God gives me". In Ephesians 5:22 it says " Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church...". Quite often guys will jokingly quote this scripture, perhaps sometimes with some degree of belief, making the point the the wife should do whatever the husband says. Rarely do they carry on from that where it says in verse 25:

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy ... in this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies."

To me this is the real challenge is. To love my Wife with the same level of commitment, dedication and passion that Christ showed to me by laying down his life. That whatever decisions are made, they are in her best interest.

3) Under "Money Issues..", an Anonymous who is a husband commented "...I would want to think that I am the main breadwinner, providing everything including frills for the wife. Trust me, most men, real men do..."
Do you think most men, including yourself, really share the same sentiment or should equality reign in couples in this day and age?

Jared: The topic of money is one that I think that has numerous and varied opinions. I think at the heart of most men there is that 'hunter and gatherer' mentality that we want to be able to provide for all of our wife's/families needs. At the end of the day though, every couple is different. Everyone (men and women) have their own desires and dreams for what they want to accomplish in life. I think that the topic of money needs to be something that is discussed by a couple early on, so that both sides are aware of the expectations each other has.

I personally think that being married, my Wife and I are a team. Whatever we do, it is for each other's benefit. Money is only one of many aspects of our marriage. If my wife earns more than me, then I wouldn't feel less of a man, or that I'm not a 'real man' as Mr Anonymous may suggest. No one should feel that they are defined by how much they earn. There are far more important things in this world.

4) We discussed a lot about love languages under "Five Love Languages", 1/7/2010. How do you feel when your wife speaks the right love language to you?

Jared:  This follows on from my point in answer #1. It's important  to know what your spouse's love languages are, to be able to ensure their 'love tank' is full. Luckily (or not so luckily) for me my wife has ALL 5 of them!! Oh the choices =)

As for me, when my wife speaks my love languages, not only do I feel loved, but I know that she understands how I work and that she makes the effort speak love to me in a way that I understand. For me my main languages are quality time and gifts of service. So when she does something like doing a chore for me that I usually do even though she doesn't like doing it (the reason I usually do it), then I am not only grateful, but feel loved that she did something that made me happy, and not her.

Appreciation: Many thanks, Jared, for sharing your heart with us on Carpe Diem Mamas! It's good to see the other side of a coin once in awhile. Mamas, do your husbands share Jared's opinions on the above issues? If you're a husband/male reader, we'd like to know what you think too....

My Brother, My Sister.... My Friend

I attended a cousin's wedding recently. She is the only girl among five siblings. Yet, she and her brothers are close and care deeply for one another. When we joked that the groom-to-be had to be 'cross-examined' and approved by the brothers first, the eldest brother candidly replied, "Of course! No one can bully our sister--- but us!"

How wonderful to have siblings looking out for you..

On the other extreme, an intensely bitter sibling rivalry between two brothers in Sabah ended with one murdering the other. This happened quite recently on 1st April 2010. The mother said the two fought often over petty issues which she believed was due to jealousy and unhappiness. The father said the two sons had been at odds with each other ever since the younger one was 3 years old. (Source: Sibling rivalry ends in murder)

Tragic, isn't it? -  that children from the same womb should hate each other so much!

Although sibling quarrels are normal and part of growing up, as a mother, I want my children to get along well because at the end of the day, no matter what happens, blood is thicker than water. It should be your family that stands by you when the chips are down. I think it would break any mother's heart to see the children she gave birth to mired in strife and hate.

What factors contribute to the quality of sibling relationships?

a) Sex and Temperament

- Sibling relationships are more likely to be warm and harmonious between siblings of the same sex (Dunn & Kendrick, 1981) and when neither is temperamentally emotional (Brody, Stoneman & McCoy, 1994).

b) Age

Sibling relationships generally improve as the younger one approaches adolescence because they begin to perceive each other as equals (Buhrmester & Furman, 1990)

c) Parents' treatment of children

Siblings more often get along when they believe parents have no 'favourites' but treat all equally (Kowal & Kramer, 1997). When parents exalt one child's accomplishments while ignoring the other, children will notice and the sibling relationship suffers.

d) Parents' relationship with each other

A warm, harmonious relationship between parents often makes for positive sibling relationships; conflict between parents is associated with conflict between siblings (Volling & Belsky, 1992). When parents don't get along, they no longer treat their children the same, leading to conflict among siblings (Brody et al., 1994)

[Source: Children and their Development, Robert V. Kail]

The implication we get from the above is that we as parents can influence sibling relationships for the better if we are loving towards each other, and be equally affectionate, responsive as well as caring towards all of our children.

From your experience, how have the above factors influenced your sibling relationships? And how do you improve on those factors to enhance your children's relationships with one another?

 At the end of the day.....

 A brother (sister) is a friend God gave you; A friend is a brother (sister) your heart chose.

-Proverb

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

D.I.Y. Play dough Fun!

I love play dough! Who doesn't?

It's a great form of play that is divergent with endless possibilities and plenty of room for creativity. Children love it and they come up with the most amazing things if we just let them be. It's also educational; when I make it with my daughter, I'd tell her the measurement for the ingredients needed (Maths concept), what they're called (Vocabulary - Language), what they're for (e.g. salt for preservation - Science concept) and I let her mix and knead it (Fine Motor Skills).

Between commercial and home made play dough, I prefer the latter simply because:

a) Making it is part of the fun

b) It's more economical

c) Safe, non-toxic and edible (though not for eating, but in case they put it in their mouths, it's not the end of the world for us..)

d) We can make fresh batches everytime the old ones are stale or dirty.

Here's the recipe I usually use:

2 cups of flour

1 cup of salt

4 teaspoons cream of tartar

1 cup of hot water 

1 tablespoon of cooking oil

Food colouring (amount depends on how bright you want the colour to be)

Method: Mix dry ingredients followed by wet ingredients together. Knead until smooth and 'clean', as in it doesn't stick to your hands or the table. If it's sticky, add more flour. If too dry and crumbly, add a bit of water. Keep in airtight container. Should last about two weeks or more-depending on how tight the container is. It is even better to keep it refrigerated. If it starts to smell funny, discard and make a fresh batch.

My 'masterpieces':

 Meet the

residents of 

"Gumby-ville".

  Daughter's 'masterpieces':

"Mask"

"Thumbelina"

What other D.I.Y play ideas have you tried with your children at home? 



More play dough recipes to try as they yield different textures and consistency:

Oatmeal dough
2 cups oatmeal
1 cup flour
1/2 cup water

Combine ingredients and knead well. Finished projects can be painted when dry.

Baker's Clay
1 cup cornstarch
2 cups baking soda
1 1/2 cups cold water

Combine ingredients. Stir till smooth. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly until consistency is like dry mashed potatoes. Turn out onto plate or bowl, covering with damp cloth. When cooled, knead thoroughly until smooth.

Salt Dough
4 cups of salt
1 cup cornstarch

Combine with sufficient water to form a paste. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly.

(Source: Creative Resources for the Early Childhood Classroom, 2nd edition by Judy Herr and Yvonne Libby)

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

Money issues - Leading cause of Marital Problems?

Recently, there was a discussion on the radio about money issues being the main source of marital quarrels. 

Agree/Disagree ?

In fact, a study by Jeffrey Dew, Utah State University, found that couples who argue about money once a week are 30% more likely to divorce than couples who disagree about finances few times a month.

Here are some common examples of  how money issues can drive a wedge between couples:

• Wife complaining that Husband doesn't earn enough.
• Husband wants Wife to work to help pay for bills, whereas Wife wants to be full-time homemaker.
• Wife blames Husband for losing their savings in a bad investment choice.
• Wife earns less than Husband, but is expected to pay for all other household expenses while Husband pays for car and house loans.
• Husband thinks Wife spends too much on a handbag whereas Wife wouldn't be caught dead with an imitation Louis Vuitton.
• Husband/Wife feels spouse passes too much money to his/her own family members.
• Wife is hurt that Husband has not changed his insurance policy beneficiary to her instead of his sister.

The list is endless as it differs from couple to couple. Although the situation is unique to each couple, it all boils down to managing each other's expectations. For example, before we got married, my then fiance thought both of us should pay for future expenses equally. I, on the other hand, thought THE MAN should shoulder most of the financial burden as the woman would be shouldering a different kind of burden besides work: pregnancy, labour pain, child birth, breastfeeding pain, sleepless nights, childcare, managing household -- so wouldn't the woman be tipping the scale already as far as contributions are concerned?

Anyway, the pre-marital course we attended brought to light our differences due to our:

a) Family Upbringing

b) Financial Background

c) Financial Goals and Priorities. 

To prevent such disputes, disciplined planning and budgeting are advocated.

Here are some more useful tips about solving money problems within marriage - summarized:

1. Communicate openly and honestly about:
i. Goals
ii. Limits 
iii. Budget

2. Set Aside Selfishness

Simple, yet not so simple, right? 

How else should couples iron out their $$$ disputes? And just for the fun of it, should husbands give wives a monthly allowance? Even if the wife is working and earning a salary? But if wives earn more, should they give husbands an allowance then?

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

"Spring Cleaning"...........

Hi all, 

As you can see, I've given the mama blog a new look. Just like how we spring clean our homes and rearrange the furniture every now and then, a change is always good for the soul. Besides the new look, other changes that follow:

a) Frequency of Posting

I've decided to post every Monday and Thursday or twice a week. This is due to time constraint on my part as well as to give time for readers to ponder and respond to each post.

b) What the Men say in "Man Talk"

Although the blog's topics and discussion so far have been exclusively mama/women-oriented, I will be asking papas or papas-to-be to give their point of view on certain topics, comments previously submitted by readers. questions on parenting/marriage/children...etc. This will take place every 1st and 3rd week of the month on Thursdays. Let me know if you'd like to volunteer your husbands!

That's all for now. Hope we can all move forward with a fresh new start! But do expect some 'spring cleaning' every now and then. :D

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

Multiple Intelligences

Somebody sent me this video of a talk by Sir Ken Robinson, creativity expert who challenges the way we are educating our children. He champions a radical rethink of our school systems, to cultivate creativity and to acknowledge multiple types of intelligences. I urge you to have a look-- it is hilarious and enlightening:

Ken Robinson, Schools Kill Creativity. video

Along with that, I have also listed out here different types of intelligences as postulated by Howard Gardner, a psychologist and professor of neuroscience from Harvard University. His theory challenged the age old understanding that everyone is born with a uniform cognitive capacity that can be measured by short answer tests....which is practiced in our education systems today.

Hopefully, this will make us rethink about how our children should learn as well as appreciate that every individual's capability is not necessarily measured by the school's report card....

Gardner's Multiple Intelligences:

 
1. Linguistic Intelligence: the capacity to use language to express what's on your mind and to understand other people. Any kind of writer, orator, speaker, lawyer, or other person for whom language is an important stock in trade has great linguistic intelligence.



 

2. Logical/Mathematical Intelligence: the capacity to understand the underlying principles of some kind of causal system, the way a scientist or a logician does; or to manipulate numbers, quantities, and operations, the way a mathematician does.

 


 



3. Musical Rhythmic Intelligence: the capacity to think in music; to be able to hear patterns, recognize them, and perhaps manipulate them. People who have strong musical intelligence don't just remember music easily, they can't get it out of their minds, it's so omnipresent.


 

4. Bodily/Kinesthetic Intelligence: the capacity to use your whole body or parts of your body (your hands, your fingers, your arms) to solve a problem, make something, or put on some kind of production. The most evident examples are people in athletics or the performing arts, particularly dancing or acting.
(pic: Gillian Lynne, choreographer of CATS)
 



5. Spatial Intelligence: the ability to represent the spatial world internally in your mind -- the way a sailor or airplane pilot navigates the large spatial world, or the way a chess player or sculptor represents a more circumscribed spatial world. Spatial intelligence can be used in the arts or in the sciences.


6. Naturalist Intelligence: the ability to discriminate among living things (plants, animals) and sensitivity to other features of the natural world (clouds, rock configurations). This ability was clearly of value in our evolutionary past as hunters, gatherers, and farmers; it continues to be central in such roles as botanist or chef.

7. Intrapersonal Intelligence: having an understanding of yourself; knowing who you are, what you can do, what you want to do, how you react to things, which things to avoid, and which things to gravitate toward. We are drawn to people who have a good understanding of themselves. They tend to know what they can and can't do, and to know where to go if they need help.

8. Interpersonal Intelligence: the ability to understand other people. It's an ability we all need, but is especially important for teachers, clinicians, salespersons, or politicians -- anybody who deals with other people.

9. Existential Intelligence: the ability and proclivity to pose (and ponder) questions about life, death, and ultimate realities.

 

 (Source: Gardner,MI)

Do you think your child may be inclined toward a particular kind of intelligence? With this knowledge of multiple intelligences, what do you think about letting a child join all kinds of activities vs. focusing on one?

"Mama's Battle Scars"

For mums-to-be, getting pregnant is both a joyful and harrowing experience. We go through a lot of hormonal, emotional and physical changes. Speaking of physical, one can't deny that before and after pregnancy, our bodies just aren't the same. I like to call them "Mama's Battle Scars"-- signs of how we sacrifice a little of ourselves as we bring new life into the world. 

Here's a short list of some common 'battles scars' and how to prevent/treat them (if at all possible). 

JELLY BELLY

One can easily tell if a woman has or hasn't given birth when you see her in tight or hipster jeans. 

For those who have given birth, our lower belly tends to 'spill over' the top, looking like the edge of a muffin. My jelly belly was so severe (I gained an extra 27kg while pregnant with my 2nd), that people were still asking me if I was about to deliver soon -- 6 months AFTER I gave birth.. (true story!)

Prevention:

I doubt if there is any way to prevent this as our muscles are stretched so much while our uterus expands.

Treatment:

- Breastfeeding as much as possible to help the uterus contract.

- A comprehensive exercise program which includes cardio workout and ab toning exercises.

STRETCH MARKS

More than half of pregnant women will develop stretch marks during pregnancy and the color range from pinkish to darker streaks of blue or purple. For darker skinned women, they may be lighter in color. I was shocked when I spotted purple stretch marks on both my thighs when I was first pregnant.  At that time, I just bought a bottle of stretch mark cream and didn't even have the chance to apply it. Apparently, the amount of stretch marks one gets depends on how elastic our skin is, which depends very much on our genetic make-up--  and which, unfortunately, is out of our control. It also depends on how rapidly we gain weight -- which is within our control. Supposedly...

Prevention

-So far, there are no scientific studies that support the claims of different creams and lotions that can prevent stretch marks although some women may swear by cocoa butter. My sister used Bio-Oil and it seemed to have done her some good. 

- The best thing to do besides using creams is to gain the recommended amount of weight (between 25 and 34 pounds). 

Treatment

-First and foremost, stretch marks tend to fade by itself or become lighter over time although they may not completely disappear. So, if it does, nothing more to worry about...

- Apparently, there are methods e.g. laser treatments, surgical skin resection, microdermabrasion which are expensive and not guaranteed to completely remove them.

- Stretch marks cream e.g. cocoa butter cream, Tretinoin (Retin-A), creams with collagen, elastin, emu oil, liposomes..etc helps to penetrate the skin's layers and work on damaged skin. The challenge of course is finding the right cream. Anyone can testify about one that worked wonders for you?

- Frankly, I think that unless you make a living as a supermodel, this is hardly a cause for concern. But then again, to each her own...

(Source: Stretch Marks, Ezine)
 

SAGGY BREASTS

Have you tried putting on your pre-pregnancy brassiere after birth and go "Funny.. they didn't look like that last time.."?

"How your breasts change during a pregnancy is related to genetics, skin elasticity and amount of weight gain. Avoidance of smoking and excessive sun exposure can help the skin to retain its elasticity.

Breastfeeding often gets blamed for the sagging of breasts. Actually, it is pregnancy and not nursing that affects the shape and size of your breasts. Breastfeeding and gradual weaning make it more likely that fat will be redeposited in your breasts, helping them to regain more of their pre-pregnancy appearance (Minchin, 1989). Pregnancy & Parenting

Usually by about six months after weaning, your breasts will have returned to more of their pre-pregnancy look. They also will feel more dense, as fatty tissue begins to fill them out again."

-- I have to disagree with the last two sentences. I breastfed, it was more than 6 months after I weaned off my first baby and my breasts still have not returned to their pre-pregnancy look --- I doubt if they ever will again.

Prevention

- Some say that wearing a properly fitted maternity bra will help as our body changes throughout the pregnancy.

- Prescription breast cream might help.

- Strengthening chest muscles so they can support enlarged breasts.

Treatment

-Chest exercises e.g. light weight lifting

-Herb supplement  to help firm the breasts e.g. shatavari, P. mirifica, Ashoka, Lodra and amalaki 

-Breast firming products e.g. pills, capsules, extracts, liquids are used for internal medication whereas creams, oils, gels, lotions and some specially made sprays help in firming the breasts.

- Massaging breasts with medicated herbal oil (Source: Ezine)

- There is however, a school of thought/study that says NOT wearing bras helps to decrease breasts sagging. Bras and Sagging.

- Of course, there's always plastic surgery e.g. breast augmentation.

Of the above, I've only tried exercises which helps a little although I guess it won't return the breasts to what they used to be. Therefore, meet my good friends, Wacoal and Xixili....

SPIDER AND VARICOSE VEINS

I saw a friend with dark spider veins all over her foot and varicose veins on her calves. So far, I've been spared from it although who knows if I were to carry on with more pregnancies. My own mother had a lot of varicose and spider veins. She recalled that sometimes it caused her excruciating pain.

Prevention

• Wear sunscreen to protect your skin from the sun and to limit spider veins on the face.
• Exercise regularly to improve your leg strength, circulation, and vein strength. Focus on exercises that work your legs, such as walking or running.
• Control your weight to avoid placing too much pressure on your legs.
• Don’t cross your legs for long times when sitting.
• Elevate your legs when resting as much as possible.
• Don’t stand or sit for long periods of time. If you must stand for a long time, shift your weight from one leg to the other every few minutes. If you must sit for long periods of time, stand up and move around or take a short walk every 30 minutes.
• Wear elastic support stockings and avoid tight clothing that constricts your waist, groin, or legs.
• Avoid wearing high heels for long periods of time. Lower-heeled shoes can help tone your calf muscles to help blood move through your veins.
• Eat a low-salt diet rich in high-fiber foods. Eating fiber reduces the chances of constipation, which can contribute to varicose veins. 

Treatment

- Compression stockings

- Sclerotherapy

- Surface Laser Treatments

- Endovenous Techniques (Radiofrequency and Laser)

- Surgery

- PIN stripping

- Ambulatory phlebectomy (Source: Varicose and Spider Veins, FAQ)

Okay, do you have any of the above 'battle scars'? Or others perhaps? If not, please tell us how you prevented it, or if you do, how you treated it e.g. what creams, herbal supplements, lotions..etc that actually helped you....

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

Hard Habit to Break

When I was little, I had a few bad habits which drove my parents up the wall. Some, they managed to curb. One habit, however, still remained till today. 

The habit which they managed to stop was thumb-sucking. Yes, I was a thumb-sucker for goodness-knows-how-long. I sucked my thumb to sleep and whenever I was not doing anything -- which was most of the time at a young age of 3 - 5, maybe? I don't remember.. I sucked till my thumb was misshapen, pale and wrinkly like a prune.  I guess it got so bad that they had to 'force' me to stop by rubbing foul-smelling ointment on my thumb.

The other habit which I retained till today is 'cracking' my ankles, just like how you crack your knuckles. I could crack both ankles like castanets. One after the other. My mum used to scold  me and cane my legs to make me stop. She said it's not good for my ankle joints and I'll suffer when I'm old one day. Didn't work though...still cracking although I'm minimizing the damage by focusing more on my right ankle now.

Fast forward to today, I'm now a mummy with a little girl of my own who...... bites and chews her nails!!!! And it drives ME up the wall!! (Retribution?)

Does your child have a bad habit? How do you stop that bad habit?

There's a whole list of annoying/bad habits kids may somehow pick up:

1) Nose picking

2) Head banging/rolling

3) Body rocking

4) Teeth grinding @ bruxism

5) Hair twirling/pulling

6) Facial tics e.g. blinking eyes

7) Masturbation

8) Breath holding

9) Others

How can I break my child's bad habit? 

• First try ignoring it as the child may outgrow it him/herself.
• Praise your child for good behavior. 
• It may be nearly impossible to stop the bad habit until the child becomes interested in stopping. 
• Start by focusing on one or two bothersome/harmful habits instead of too many at one time.
• Try to figure out what may be making your child stressed.
• Let your child make decisions whenever possible, by giving them acceptable choices.   
• Redirect your child and help them find a better place, or better way to do what they are trying to do e.g. use tissue instead of picking nose, or do it in the bathroom and wash hands afterward.
• Use natural or logical consequences for problem behavior. The purpose here is to get kids to make the right decision, not to bend them to your will. Be patient—it may take time for you to see results.
• Be firm and kind.

Some habits are only annoying but harmless e.g. hair twirling. But some may be a symptom of a developmental condition (e.g. one of the signs of autism includes rocking of body back and forth) or psychological issues e.g. insecure, fearful of something, stress..etc. Others may cause problems instead e.g. teeth grinding may cause dental problems or disorder of jaw joint.

So mamas, please share if you have experienced this before with your child and how did you manage to get him/her to stop that habit. For me, I tried positive reinforcement i.e. praising her when she doesn't bite her nails. So far, that seems to work although it is still too soon to tell if it has permanently stopped.

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

I Do.....

By now, you may have noticed that I am alternating between child-related topics and marriage topics simply because as BB commented under 'Five Love Languages',  "the more loving you are as a couple...the better it'll be for ur kids as well".

Therefore I thought, what better way to be 'more loving' as a couple than to be reminded of our wedding vows - that first day when we became husband and wife? So I managed to obtain 3 versions from a local church pastor. These are the wedding vows commonly used for Christian marriages. However, I welcome women of different religions to share the wedding vows which you used.

1st version:

I, (Name), take you, (Name) to be my wife/husband,

To have and to hold,

From this day forward,

For better, For worse,

For richer, For poorer,

In sickness and in health,

To love and to cherish,

Until we are parted by death,

This is my solemn vow.

2nd version:

I take you, (Name) to be my wife/husband,

and I promise before God and all who are present here,

To be your loving and faithful wife/husband,

As long as we both shall live,

I will serve you with tenderness and respect,

And encourage you to develop God's gifts in you.

3rd version:

(Name), in the name of God,

I take you to be my wife/husband from this time onward,

To join with you and share all that is to come,

To give and to receive,

To speak and to listen,

To inspire and to respond,

And in all our lives together,

To be loyal to you with my whole being,

As long as we both shall live.

(Source: The United Methodist Book of Worship, 1992)

If you have made the above vows before and have forgotten them (like I have), why not take some time today after the kids have slept to renew that vow to each other?

"To have and to hold, From this day forward ......"

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

Apologies !!!!!!

Dear all, 

Blogspot seems to be experiencing some technical problems with the comments gadget. You might have noticed that for the posts "Five Love Languages" and "Weaning and Bottle Feeding", some of the comments seem to have disappeared. I have reported the matter already and I hope it gets rectified soon.

Do continue with our discussion and hopefully, things will go back to normal VERY, VERY soon.

Thank you.

Carpe Diem, ladies!

Becky

Honey, Honey!

"When should we feed babies/toddlers honey?"

That question was brought up during a dinner with my girlfriends and we were a bit divided about it. One said, "2 years old!" One said "No, 1 year old" Another one remarked, "My friend fed her child honey since infancy."

  So, I checked the labels on some honey jars:

So why not for infants under the age of 12 months?

Because of the risk of infant botulism. 

Infant botulism is a type of food poisoning that can result in death caused by the growth of a poisonous bacteria known as clostridium botulinum in the gastrointestinal tract of babies. Botulinum spores can be found:

1) Widely throughout nature
2) Maple syrup
3) Corn syrup (commonly found in commercial infant formula!)
4) Dust

As it is so widespread, human beings have adapted to it and able to fend off small amounts of toxin.

However, infants do not have a matured digestive system and are susceptible to botulism poisoning. Parents are recommended to avoid it unless it is pasteurized (which makes it rare), as well as foods which may contain honey.

Symptoms of infant botulism:
1) Constipation
2) Muscle weakness - sign of nervous system damage
3) Infant cries weakly
4) Infant has difficulty feeding
5) Infant will have limp and floppy appearance
6) Infant will also look lethargic
More: What is Botulism?
          How to protect my baby from Infant Botulism?
          Honey and Infant Botulism- Fact Sheet on From Health Canada

However, one article I came across says otherwise:
Why Honey is a Healthy Food for Infants

Apparently, this article says that it is only heated honey which is dangerous. The high heat (over 96 degrees Fahrenheit) kills the live enzymes which is supposed to kill bacterial cells in the honey. The writer (Judie C. Snelson) then writes about the irony that parents allow babies to be vaccinated although vaccines contain known "carcinogenic substances, heavy metals, and have dangerous, predictable side effects". On top of that, cases of injury/death caused by vaccinations dwarfs cases of infant botulism caused by honey.

The benefits of honey are numerous:

1) Natural Sweetener

2) Energy Source

3) Aids weight loss

4) Improving athletic performance

5) Source of vitamins and minerals

6) Antibiotic and antifungal properties

7) Natural antiseptic

8) Aids skin care

More: Health Benefits of Honey

          Amazing Benefits of Honey

What do you think? Are there any honey brands you know of that is so safe even for infants? (Maybe some new direct-selling product?) 

Personally, I prefer to just err on the side of caution and feed my child -when necessary- after the recommended age 1......or 2, to be even safer...